Gone are the days when women were looked down upon for the making the first move in the dating game. In fact, in the modern scenario the dating game is being re-written where women take the initiative to set changing the rules of dating. There is even a specialised dating app that empowers women to call the shots in a relationship, including ask the guy out. And the metrosexual man seems to be loving it, if a recent research is anything to go by. Not only do they welcome the advances, they also find such women more attractive.
Psychotherapist Ameeta Sanghvi Shah calls it a positive change. “Society as a whole is getting more liberal and ready to accept that women can have sexual and intimacy needs. They can take the initiative and yet be ‘decent’ and not be dominating or aggressive,” she said.
Traditional thinking is changing where a woman was supposed to play hard to get and remain coy. “Today, she could possibly initiate or respond more authentically. A workable relationship may not see the light of day simply because both are hesitant and waiting for a signal from the other,”adds Ameeta. She advises women to have an indirect approach, “Give subtle non-verbal cues instead of directly saying “I love you”. Later, it is possible to be more direct to the guy to let him know that you find him cool or interesting.”
Explaining this phenomenon, psychiatrist Dr. Rajiv Anand, says, “Most men are relatively poor in communication skills, especially when they want to meet, talk and interact with a person from the opposite gender. Some may lack confidence and avoid it. However, when a woman comes forward to talk they welcome this readily as they don’t have to work hard for it.”
Youngsters like Aryan Dixit endorse the idea of women making the first move. Says the marketing professional, “I am against the old-fashioned approach of men always making the first move. It is not about women being in control, but it is all about wanting the pressure off your back. In today’s times when women can openly express their opinions, men, too, face the fear of rejection resulting in getting tongue-tied in front of the woman they like.”