When it comes to what women want in bed, men tend to make serious avoidable mistakes like these.

Silent play: No matter the circumstances, most men tend to be eerily silent during the entire act. You may think that’s fine, but this makes your woman feel alienated. It makes her wonder if she’s actually pleasuring you. There’s no need to exaggerate your feelings, but you can let your partner know you’re enjoying her company in a genuine way. The occasional moans and groans are not such a bad thing.


Foreplay is not a means to an end: Most men tend to breeze through it — the effortless kissing here and caressing there, as they undress. But in too much anticipation of a great act, you may appear desperate to begin. And that won’t score you any brownie points in the long run. Take it slowly. Enjoy every aspect of the encounter as you get to know the woman you are with. Women enjoy a well-paced build-up — the making-out, the undressing, the reciprocal oral sex. This will also lead to a more fulfilling encounter. And perhaps, a standing invitation for more.

Forget the big O: Besides, when you approach sex with a clear focus on only reaching an orgasm, you may lose sight of the path to the climactic moment. Don’t pressure yourself, or your partner, to hit the finish line as quickly as possible. Rather than rush it, why not enjoy the experience as a whole. You’ll prolong your pleasure, and your partner will feel like she’s with a guy who actually knows what he’s doing. The conclusion, though delayed, will be a lot more satisfying for both.

Avoid the licking: Performing oral sex on a woman means quick licks at the labia majora, followed by brief, orgasm-inducing penetration with your tongue. However, while that may seem enticing, the labial tongue lashing is not a technique that docs recommend.

The fingers carefully: Although digital penetration is considered a normal part of foreplay, some guys get overeager and, confuse their fingers for penises. As a result, they finger their partners with a vigour reserved for sex. This also reflects that they have no clue what a woman wants, which is why they have resolved to go hard and fast. Instead, you should aim for a more measured approach; make her get used to the feel of your fingers as you gradually insert more of them. There’s room for intensity, but a little nuance will surely take you a long way.

Joburg Magosha


Comment with your Facebook